Archives for 2025

Cara Friend – 50 years young

25/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

50 years young, Cara Friend is celebrating its half century in style. The bastion of hope and support for so many, during the time of repression, persecution and at times physical attacks for the LGBTQI+ community, Cara Friend is remembering its beginnings and looking forward to its future.

Northern Ireland, in many ways, has always been reluctant to move forward with change. In 1967, the Sexual Offences Act decriminalised sexual activity between men over 21 in private in England and Wales; it did not apply to the Armed Forces, Merchant Navy or Scotland (later decriminalised on February 1st 1981), the Channel Islands, or the Isle of Man.

But, Northern Ireland didn’t see change until 1982 with the Homosexual Offences (Northern Ireland) Order, which legalised homosexual acts between consenting adults. This change was brought about through the result of the Dudgeon v United Kingdom government case, which was the first successful case brought before the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR) on the criminalisation of male homosexuality.

This trial was supported by NIGRA (Northern Ireland Gay Rights Association), the 1974 Committee, and Cara Friend, along with many other organisations andprivate individuals.

During April 2025, there have been several events celebrating Cara Friends’ half century of excellence:

A photographic exhibition of volunteers was launched and then put on display in the Linen Hall Library (which is very supportive of our community). This was brought about through funding from The National Lottery Heritage Fund NI (and again, others, too many to list here – see back of the wonderful booklet “Dear Friend, The History of Cara-Friend 1974-2000”). The launch took place at a private showing for Cara Friend’s befrienders and selected guests on the evening of February 3, 2025, with the general public able to access it from February 4 to February 28, 2025. This exhibition of 21 exquisite portraits explores the experiences of Cara-Friend volunteers, including those who founded the charity and guided it through the 1970s and 1980s.
On the 12th February, a panel of four befriender originators of Cara Friend was held in the Linen Hall Library from 1=2pm. It was very well attended (and honest, no one fell asleep).

A wonderful booklet, as mentioned above, “Dear Friend, The History of Cara-Friend 1974-2000”, researched and produced by Michael Lawrence as part of a six-month internship with CF from Queen’s University.

Terry-McFarlane-PXL_20250225_100612346

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It is anticipated that the exhibition will travel to various Northern Ireland and UK venues, and will also be on show at Kent State University, USA.

The thanks of everyone involved in the project (befrienders, volunteers) are also given to photographer Timothy O’Connell and oral historian Dr. Molly Merryman. Many thanks also to the team at the Queer NI – Sexuality Before Liberation Project (funded by the AHRC, AH/V008404/1), including Dr. Charlie Lynch, for their support throughout the project.

Boys or Jongens – A Gay Movie Review

21/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

“Boys or Jongens” – A Movie Review

Boys Sieger, just 15, had his eyes glued to the stopwatch and the track, convinced he knew his limits—physically, emotionally, personally. As he trains for the national relay champs, everything shifts when he crosses paths with Marc. A boy as wild and free as the wind, as unpredictable as a summer storm. Through shared laughs and quiet moments of ease, a connection sparks that goes way beyond friendship. When feelings start to deepen, Sieger embarks on more than just a race—it’s a journey into self-discovery, courage, and the true meaning of love.

Gijs Blom plays a particularly nuanced role as Sieger, coming to terms with being gay, whilst being part of the athletic world. As Sieger moves forward, he becomes friends with Marc (played by Ko Zandvliet), and they both enjoy the youthfulness of being in each other’s company. A kiss happens whilst they are at a lake. It has all the tenderness of a first kiss, with the sparcity of sex being thought about.

Boys or Jongens is a wonderful introduction to how love develops, the complexities and the joys.

Boys Boys Boys

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Impact of Book Bans on the LGBTQI+ Community in the UK

20/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Impact of Book Bans on the LGBTQI+ Community in the UK

Overview

In the UK, the issue of censorship and banned books targeting LGBTQI+ content is increasingly making headlines. While outright bans are less widespread than in some countries, recent developments highlight a concerning trend that affects young people, educators, and the broader community. These restrictions threaten access to vital stories and resources that support LGBTQI+ identities and well-being[1][2][3].

Key Effects

1. Mental Health and Wellbeing

– Increased Isolation: When LGBTQI+ books are removed from school libraries and classrooms, it sends a damaging message to young people that their identities are unwelcome or invalid. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and invisibility[1][2][3].

– Fear and Self-Censorship: Librarians and teachers often report feeling pressured or intimidated into removing LGBTQI+ literature, which results in self-censorship and limits access for students seeking representation[1][2].

– Loss of Support: Many young people rely on inclusive literature to see themselves reflected and to find reassurance. Banning these resources can harm their mental health, self-esteem, and sense of belonging[1][3].

2. Erasure of Identity and Representation

– Reduced Visibility: Censorship efforts diminish the presence of LGBTQI+ stories, history, and voices within educational environments, making it harder for young people to explore and understand their identities[1][2][3].

– Barriers to Understanding: Without access to diverse narratives, both LGBTQI+ youth and their peers miss opportunities to learn about different experiences, fostering ignorance and prejudice[1][2].

3. Societal and Educational Consequences

– Cultivating Intolerance: Targeted bans reinforce harmful stereotypes and can foster a climate of hostility, bullying, and intolerance within schools and local communities[1][2][3].

– Risks for Librarians and Educators: Those who resist censorship often face professional repercussions, including threats, job loss, or disciplinary action, discouraging the inclusion of LGBTQI+ materials[1][2].

– Chilling Effect: The absence of clear national guidance creates a climate of uncertainty, leading many librarians to avoid purchasing or displaying LGBTQI+ books altogether to prevent controversy[1][2][3].

Data and Trends

| Statistic/Trend | Source |
|———————————————————————————|————-|
| Over half (around 53%) of UK school librarians surveyed report being asked to remove books or being given a list of banned books, with many titles related to LGBTQI+ themes. | [1][2][3] |
| Requests for removal are primarily initiated by individual parents or community members, rather than official government directives, but they have a significant impact. | [1][2][3] |
| Commonly targeted titles include *This Book Is Gay* by Juno Dawson, *Julián is a Mermaid* by Jessica Love, and *ABC Pride* by Louie Stowell et al. | [2][3][4] |
| Many librarians have been instructed to remove all LGBTQI+ books after a single complaint; some have faced job insecurity for refusing. | [1][2][3] |
| There is no comprehensive UK database tracking the full scope of bans, but anecdotal evidence suggests the trend is growing. | [1][2][5] |

Voices from the Community

– Stonewall, the UK’s leading LGBTQI+ rights organisation, has called the increasing censorship “deeply troubling,” emphasising that access to inclusive resources is essential for young people’s well-being and self-acceptance[3].

– Many librarians and teachers express feeling unsupported and vulnerable. Some have resorted to discreet or off-the-record loans to ensure students can access banned books, despite risks[1][2][3].

Conclusion

The rising tide of book bans targeting LGBTQI+ content in the UK is having serious repercussions for young people and the wider community. These measures foster exclusion, erasure, and fear, undermining the vital educational and emotional support that diverse literature provides. Without clear guidance and backing from national authorities, many educators feel compelled to self-censor, further limiting access to inclusive stories. Advocacy organisations like Stonewall and professional bodies must continue to push for policies that safeguard the right to inclusive education and ensure every young person can see themselves reflected positively in the books they read[1][2][3].

—

References:
1. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/lgbt-books-removed-uk-libraries-b2732791.html
2. https://www.indexoncensorship.org/2024/08/banned-school-librarians-shushed-over-lgbt-books/
3. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/lgbt-books-ban-uk-schools-library-b2596374.html
4. https://www.thebookseller.com/news/school-libraries-censored-as-survey-reveals-28-librarians-asked-to-remove-books-from-shelves
5. https://www.lovereading4kids.co.uk/school-blog/censorship-more-than-half-of-school-librarians-asked-to-remove-books-from-their-shelves-6430

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Queer spaces are something which our community in Northern Ireland is loosing memory about. When I first came out on the scene, there were at least 42 different event nights encompassing at least 20 different venues. Today, there are many fewer, and with that comes less choice. So far, I have written one in-depth article about ‘The Carpenter Club“, I am now about to start one on Delaney’s, so if you have any thoughts, news, titbits, pics that would be of use, please let me have them.

The Lavender Scare Revisited

19/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Lavender Scare

The Lavender Scare serves as a powerful reminder of the dangers of state-sanctioned discrimination against LGBTQI+ individuals and the profound impact it can have on lives and civil rights. While the UK has made notable progress since the deeply ingrained stigma of the mid-20th century, ongoing advocacy and awareness remain vital to achieving true equality and acceptance. Understanding this historical context is essential for recognising how far we’ve come and the work still ahead to fully support LGBTQI+ rights and inclusion.

The “Lavender Scare” describes a dark chapter in mid-20th-century history, mainly from the late 1940s through the 1960s, when gay men and lesbians working in the US federal government faced widespread dismissal and forced resignation because of their sexuality. This period of repression was closely linked to anti-communist fears and congressional investigations, which falsely painted LGBTQ+ individuals as security threats and potential communist sympathisers.

Key lessons from the Lavender Scare include:

Perception of vulnerability: Homosexuality was heavily stigmatised, with the false belief that LGBTQ+ individuals were susceptible to blackmail, risking national security.
Anti-communist parallels: This era coincided with the Red Scare and McCarthyism, where suspicion of communist ties led to widespread suspicion and persecution.
Dismissals and forced resignations: Many federal employees were fired or compelled to leave their jobs solely based on their sexual orientation.
Absence of legal protections: There were no laws safeguarding against discrimination based on sexual orientation during this time.
Social isolation and stigma: Many affected individuals faced profound social rejection and lived in fear and silence.
Impact on civil rights: The Lavender Scare fueled the broader fight for LGBTQ+ civil rights, highlighting the need for equality.
Legal progress: Over time, legal battles and court rulings began to challenge and curb federal discrimination, laying the groundwork for future protections.

Reflecting on this history underscores both the resilience of the LGBTQI+ community and the ongoing necessity of activism and awareness to protect and advance their rights today.

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Abysse – A Short Movie Review

15/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Abysse is about loss. Félix and Matthieu have been friends since childhood, bound by years of shared memories. When Félix returns to Bordeaux for the summer, it’s with the hope of reconnecting and reliving those carefree days. But one evening, Matthieu vanishes without a trace, leaving Félix haunted by unanswered questions. He plunges into a world of silence and confusion, embarking on a relentless, almost senseless quest to reclaim a friendship that feels lost forever.

A film crafted with care by writer and director Justin Berrocal.

Starring: Vincent Lambin, Baptiste Miremont, Romane Braud, Oscar Lalanne, Justin Berrocal

Director of Photography: Florian Gislier
Original Music: Paul Klein
Editing: Thomas Lescure
Sound Engineer: Florian Gislier
Colour Grading/Mixing: Florian Gislier

Length: 15.48 mins

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The Saint – Nothing New

14/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

This week, I picked up a copy of “The Saint Plays with Fire“, published originally in 1958.

To many, the Saint is either a radio series, a TV series featuring Roger Moore or Ian Ogilvy, or a film starring actors such as Val Kilmer. However, the full flavour can only be understood by reading the original books. There will be elements which are no longer acceptable in terms of comments and observations by the Saint, his friends and the ‘baddies’. There is not a small degree of nostalgia for the somewhat gentile era that has long left us, but there is nothing wrong with dreams and nostalgia.

However, the reason I have put pen to paper about this book is because of this extract from the book:

“… to crush them like vermin, to destroy them like rats who would carry their plague germs through our fair land! The blood of a million Frenchmen, dead on the fields of glory, cries out to you to show yourselves worthy of their sacrifice. Rise up and arm yourselves against this peril that threatens you from within; stamp out these cowardly pacifists, these skulking traitors, these godless anarchists, these alien Jews who are betraying out country for a handful of gold … Sons of France, I call you to arms. Fling yourselves into the fight with a song on your lips and glory in your hearts, for only in the blood and fire of battle will our nation be purified and find once ore her true soul!”

I write to warn you about the same thing that Leslie Charteris wrote about in 1958; the Far Right Parties that have reconstituted in Europe, these are not listed in any particular relevance, just a list:

1.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conservative_People%27s_Party_of_Estonia
2.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vox_(Spanish_political_party)
3.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fidesz
4.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Our_Homeland_Movement
5.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sweden_Democrats
6.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lega_Nord
7.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brothers_of_Italy
8.	https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spartans_(Greek_political_party)

But, we are haemorrhaging under these ‘far right’ parties who are destroying our culture under the guise of protecting our future; the slow creeping of these parties taking a position in government, brain washing a proportion of the populace about the damage that minority groups are causing to their way of live in terms of wages, housing, safety is so reminiscent of a period in history that we have only just celebrated the end of with VE day.

History must not be allowed to repeat itself, either here in the UK, or in Europe; or in the USA which seems to have even its constitution under threat.

In the light of these pressures, I can and do encourage everyone who can vote to vote when given the opportunity to vote, don’t let our way of life be taken away because you have been disillusioned with politics or politicians!

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Happy Pride Month

13/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Happy Pride Month to everyone, whether you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community or simply here to celebrate diversity and inclusion. We can all join in the joy and solidarity!

I wanted to share some thoughts that have been circulating on social media, and I think they’re worth reflecting on. It’s a strange and somewhat unsettling time for the LGBTQ+ community. Over the years, many of us have become complacent, thinking the hard-fought battles are behind us. We tend to believe that professionals and advocates are handling everything, so we don’t need to be actively involved.

But the truth is, rights that many fought tirelessly for are gradually slipping away. Attitudes that shifted towards acceptance are now being pushed back. It’s a slow erosion, and it only takes one person in a position of power, such as a president with unchecked authority, to implement changes we will all regret.

This is a reminder: now more than ever, we need to look out for our friends and neighbours, regardless of their background. Because the truth is, any of us could find ourselves in the minority someday. Let’s stay vigilant, compassionate, and united, and have a Happy Pride Month.

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Decoys & Ghosts – Art Exhibition – Golden thread Gallery, Belfast

08/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Decoys & Ghosts - John Rainery 1 Decoys & Ghosts. In April 2025, the Golden Thread Gallery in Belfast unveiled ‘Decoys and Ghosts,’ an ambitious exhibition that delves into two core themes that have shaped Rainey’s sculptural practice over the past decade: imitation and revisiting. Throughout his career, materials, their histories, and the processes they undergo have been fundamental to Rainey’s work, serving as a lens through which he explores these ideas.

Rainey’s approach to exhibition staging is particularly noteworthy. He crafts environments and designs experiences that encourage cultural interactions, transforming simple installations into dynamic spaces where groups of different cultures can forge relationships. In his hands, plinths transcend their traditional role, evolving into dioramas or becoming viewing platforms that invite audiences to engage physically—climb, explore, and immerse themselves.

‘Decoys and Ghosts’ Decoys & Ghosts - John Rainery 2 at the Golden Thread Gallery (by John Rainey) presents a compelling mix of retrospective pieces and new works, anchored by a significant large-scale installation that epitomises these themes. This exhibition stands as Rainey’s most comprehensive survey to date, offering a rare opportunity to witness the evolution of his practice, highlighting recent innovations alongside the works that have shaped his journey thus far.

I was interested in the exhibition and visited on Wednesday 4th June 2026, but felt that I was missing something when I came away – I was looking for more interpretation of the work, but maybe that is just me.

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I’m Not Gay (2020) – Gay Short Movie Review

06/06/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

I'm Not Gay

At first glance, ‘I’m Not Gay’ (2020) might seem like a title meant to grab attention, provocative, even. But underneath that boldness lies a subtle, layered film that explores the nuances of identity, repression, and masculinity. It’s a quietly powerful character study that challenges how we perceive others and, more importantly, how we confront our own truths when no one’s looking.

Plot Summary

The movie centres on Jake Donovan (Lucas Hedges), a college athlete from a conservative Midwest town where masculinity is rigid, emotions are hidden, and identity feels like it’s handed down rather than chosen. Jake appears to fit the mould: confident, straight, tough. But everything shifts when he befriends Adam (Justice Smith), an art student with a gentle spirit and an unapologetic authenticity that both intrigues and unsettles Jake.

What starts as late-night talks and shared secrets gradually morphs into something unspoken — a connection neither of them is ready to define. As rumours spread and external pressures mount from teammates, family, and community, Jake’s repeated insistence of “I’m not gay” becomes a shield, a way to cling to his constructed identity. But inside, his world is quietly unravelling. The real conflict isn’t just societal—it’s internal, a battle with fear, desire, and self-denial.

Artistic Approach

Directed by Eliza Hittman (*Beach Rats*), “I’m Not Gay” captures that tense silence of repression with intimate cinematography and a visual language that speaks volumes. The camera lingers on subtle gestures — a hesitant touch, a prolonged glance, the weight of unspoken words filling the space.

There’s a raw honesty to how scenes unfold — no melodramatic moments, just quiet internal struggles spilling over. The muted colour palette, soft lighting, and ambient sounds create an almost tactile sense of emotional discomfort. The score by Rob Simonsen delicately weaves piano and atmospheric textures, emphasising the emotional layers without overpowering the subtle storytelling.

Performances

Lucas Hedges delivers a deeply affecting performance. He’s not just playing a guy questioning his sexuality; he embodies the fear of losing himself, the denial wrapped around vulnerability. Every look, every hesitation, feels authentic — a layered portrayal of someone caught between who they are and who they’re supposed to be.

Justice Smith’s Adam is a quiet force — calm, genuine, fully realised. His presence serves as a mirror for Jake, pushing him to confront what he’s been avoiding. Their chemistry crackles with complexity, blending fear, tenderness, and confusion in a way that feels real and raw.

Supporting roles deepen the story — Cherry Jones as Jake’s emotionally distant mother adds a layer of generational tension and cultural context, underscoring the silent pressures that shape Jake’s world.

Emotional Depth

This film isn’t about easy answers or neat resolutions. It plunges into the discomfort — the kind that comes with feeling like you don’t fit into any box, craving connection but fearing the cost. It’s less about coming out and more about coming to terms with oneself in silence.

*I’m Not Gay* asks: what happens when we spend our lives trying to prove something, only to realise we’ve been trying to prove it to ourselves all along? Jake’s journey is painfully authentic, resonating with anyone who’s ever struggled with fear, denial, or the longing to be understood without judgment.

The final scene, a quiet moment of truth between two characters in a dimly lit room, speaks volumes in its silence, more than any dramatic confession ever could.

Tone and Rhythm

The film’s pace is slow and contemplative, mirroring the natural process of emotional change. It’s a deliberate, restrained storytelling choice — feelings don’t shift overnight, and repression isn’t broken in a single scene. Instead, the movie reflects the gradual, often painful, peeling away of armour, revealing the quiet bravery of facing oneself.

Final Thoughts

*I’m Not Gay* (2020) is a courageous, honest portrait of identity and repression. It’s less about labels and more about the universal human desire to be loved for who we are, not who we’re told to be. It lingers long after the credits, in unspoken words, lingering glances, and the hearts of those still trying to understand their truth.

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Scraps – A Short LGBTQ Movie Review

29/05/2025 By ACOMSDave Leave a Comment

Scraps Experience the poignant coming-of-age story of SCRAPS, a gay romance skateboarding short film that captures the vibrant energy of skate culture intertwined with tender moments of self-discovery. Set against the rugged backdrop of rural 2003 Montana, this indie LGBTQ+ film follows a closeted teen artist as he falls for an openly skateboarding boy, confronting the fears of small-town judgment and the courage to embrace his identity. Featuring compelling performances by Dorian Giordano and Peder Lindell, SCRAPS echoes the emotional depth of films like Mid-90s, Call Me By Your Name, and The Perks of Being a Wallflower. It’s a heartfelt journey of love, vulnerability, and growth during a defining summer in a small town.

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